Saturday, July 23, 2011

Have YOU moved to JustGQ.com yet?!


Thanks for your readership! Have YOU checked in the game at JustGQ.com yet? You can subscribe and continue receiving blog updates! Just look in the right panel on the home page! All the blogspot posts have been transferred over to the new site! See you soon! #JustGQ

Monday, June 13, 2011

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Bright Lights, Big Hats, & Bowties



The Mixx Magazine released its new, "Self Made Men" issue on Monday, and Just GQ is featured in it, speaking on Spring fashion trends, primarily Derby fashion. Read on to see the article, and make sure you check out The Mixx Magazine (just click the link at the beginning of the post)! Let's SUPPORT! GOD BLESS!
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As the Bluegrass state basks in the national sporting spotlight, the events comprising the Kentucky Derby festivities double as a continuous fashion show. The colors much like the lights, which accentuate the dirt and grass tracks at Churchill Downs are bright by nature, crossing patterns and matching plaids with stripes and solids, alike. The bold fashions surrounding the events may actually precede the allure of the race, which draws 155,000 people from around the world, who come to experience all that Derby has to offer.

In the interest of southern charm and chivalry, we will, initially, address the ladies. The staple of Derby fashion lies in the famous accessory, the “Derby hat”. While the gentlemen participate in this trend with caps and fedoras, these oversized, colorful beauties complement the prim, proper demeanor conveyed through the dresses and other ensembles dawned by the girls and women taking part in this riveting time. Every female attending the weekend’s celebrations dare not leave the house for the track without a brim wide enough to deserve an “excuse me” as people avoid the item, which secures one’s personal space in a fashionable manner.

As for the fellas, their statements through fashion derive from suits and colorful, yet unique shirts, ties, and shoes. Classic, regal style reigns supreme across the board particularly, though, as the men sport seersucker, linen, and poplin suits, suits constructed from naturally lighter materials in accommodation for warmer weather. In addition to these mainstay suits for Derby, bowties run rampant, coming in a cornucopia of styles (classic, diamond & skinny among others) and colors often serving as the signature pieces in men’s looks. The bowtie, however, while frequently worn, does not claim exclusive rights to the neckwear at Derby. Half windors, full windsors, and skinny ties  (oh my!) also play a starring role in this suited presentation.

So with a valediction of wingtips and stilettos, I bid you adieu in hopes that as you gear up for 137th Kentucky Derby, you are, now, in the know regarding pieces you can incorporate into your personal style to put your best foot forward. Thanks for checking in the GAME with Just GQ!



Monday, June 6, 2011

The Mike Jones Factor

 


Happy Monday, all! Are y’all ready to check in the game? Let’s go!


Surely everyone remembers the 2000s Swishahouse recording artist, Mike Jones. WHO? MIKE JONES (bet you didn’t see that coming. lol). His first and maybe only bona fide hit (if memory serves correctly) described his personal tale of how he rose from ashy to classy. Word to Jergen’s; I kid. In this requested topic for Just GQ,—keep the suggestions coming by the way—I will address, what I like to call “The Mike Jones factor” (cue dramatic music)!

A 20-something woman once told me that girls need to date a bad boy once in their lives because that experience helps them better appreciate when they get a good guy. Also, a couple nights ago on Twitter, I saw a tweet that read, “Nice guys finish last because the nice guy is the last guy she will ever be with.” I’m not gonna lie; I threw up a little when I read this.

WHO wants to be that guy?! WHO wants to be penalized for being a nice guy and shying away from thuggish behavior, clearly showcasing a well put together presentation? Should nice guys be comforted in knowing that after she’s tired of being done wrong by every other dude, he can serve as her safety net? NO! Excuse me for a moment. *regains composure*

As I have never been nor claimed to be a thug of any persuasion or a victimized nice guy, I have not directly been involved in this less than logical conundrum; however, I have observed and served as a makeshift consultant at times. The situation gets dicey when nice guys realize that the “nice guy approach” fails, deferring to a lesser opponent in the majority of cases. Once observed and analyzed, nice guys often deduce, “I tried to be nice, but she chose the dude that talks bad to her, treats her poorly, and clearly is sputtering in life’s race. While I won’t sacrifice my ambition and path to success, I can oblige her desire to be with a jerk.” This behavior, in its most basic form, performs as the machete that has been taken to the very core of chivalry.

This conclusion holds a transferable nature to any scenario in which the lesser opponent is awarded the prize, the prize being the object of affection (regardless of sex). When dealing with “emotional cutters”—not to make light of self-mutilation—they are often drawn to negative situations like moths to flames and fight potentially positive relationships. When dealing with leeches, these “ladies” continuously hop from progressive boat to progressive boat looking for a life of luxury with minimal labor on her part. In common terms, this class of people has been deemed as “groupies” by society. In the initial life draft, she may have latched onto an athlete with league potential for the actual draft of a major sport yielding major compensation, but as most of us know, league dreams often draw parallels with pipe dreams failing to produce ideal results.

Following this development, this person will dock the first boat and begin searching for another one to board; cue the “nice guy”. At this point, the “nice guy”, opted for the more traditional route of progression, if ambitious, perhaps he has enrolled in law school or med school; maybe he is an engineer. This is what I deem the “supplemental draft”. They tried the dope boy; fail. They tried the athlete; higher success rate but fail. Now, interest peaks regarding the newly successful “nice guy”, but at this point, the “nice guy” has generated interest from numerous other parties, many more than likely with good intentions and lacking an ulterior motive.

In the Mike Jones’ hit, he repeatedly stated, “Back then they didn’t want me; now, I’m hot, and they all on me.”

This line conveys the feeling felt by the “nice guy” when he realizes that his pre-supplemental draft stock is actively rising, spite. The very females who played him while he was in grind mode to achieve his goals, express a change in heart once they see his goals have been or are being reached, and thus the “Mike Jones factor” goes into effect. 

Thanks for checking in the GAME with me.. #GETHYPED because in a week, we will be launching JustGQ.com (June 13)! God Bless!

Thursday, June 2, 2011

You Just Mad Cuz I'm Stylin' On You...



(This picture does not really illustrate the post, but...it's kinda funny. Don't you judge me! #shrug)

We know through prior conversation and experience that people think and function in a shallow manner, initially, at the very least. This is true and unavoidable, however, we have also learned that pre-judgment worked strategically, then, becomes an advantage, an asset to an extent. One’s personal style portrays personality and speaks volumes in regards to a person without he/she even uttering a word. Trends come and trends go, but cool is forever, and as people shamelessly follow trends and fads like celebrities on Twitter, it is very possible to swing & miss when constructing a personal style. The beauty within that lies in the fact that being an individual automatically distinguishes you from the crowd.

Breaking away can certainly make you a “one-man wolfpack”, however just as Alan gained three more wolves in his pack, people will more than likely respect and/or follow your personal style, unless you are a jerk trying to be outrageous just for something to do, but I digress. Realize, though, that people tend to resist and view differences in a less than favorable manner, and because of that, confidence is key when establishing one’s personal style. Experiment. Some things will work. Some things won’t work. This is all a part of figuring out what works for you, but people will still hate. Allow this unsolicited, worthless commentary to render ZERO reaction from you, cementing your mentality in your freshness.

I will level with you because I feel like I can let my guard down with you, some a couple of the fits I have worn in the past were —um..— wack less than fly in retrospect. While my choice in clothes perhaps could have been better on those select occasions, the confidence I exuded more than made up for a less than attractive shirt, pair of pants or shoes because confidence encompasses the ultimate aphrodisiac, and the majority of people can appreciate genuine confidence in the midst of overwhelming societal facades.

For the record: This really only happened like twice in life, I have been fly since pampers and pull-ups, #andthatsreal!. ;-)

Anyways, whether people say you are a white person trying to dress “black”, a black person trying to dress “white”, or just general thoughtless, inaccurate remarks, they are only words. Ignore them. OBSERVE other styles for ideas. EXPERIMENT with your own look. INCORPORATE ideas where possible, and stand out while being comfortable and happy with yourself!

Thanks for checking in the GAME! I would like to OFFICIALLY announce that JustGQ.com will be launching on JUNE 13! #GETHYPED! Stay tuned! Also, please SUBSCRIBE to the Just GQ YouTube channel! God Bless!

Monday, May 30, 2011

The "A" in Achievement Stands For Asterisk


I visited Old Navy in search of some light wash jeans at an affordable price (I practice smart shopping. lol), and as I continued on my search, I ran into someone I knew from my high school years in Evansville, IN (a white male, for the record). During our conversation, we filled each other in our personal progressions along with those of our mutual friends. I gained the news that one of my friends from high school, who happens to be bi-racial, recently graduated with his Masters degree in business from Indiana University’s Kelley School of Business, a top 20 U.S. institution and now works for a top global accounting firm. Big things right? In my jubilation for my friend’s accomplishments, I was interrupted by the unsolicited comment from my acquaintance with whom I was talking that simply stated an asterisk need to be placed by his success because he was “a smart black guy” (record skip—now, what now?). Initially, I paused thinking that maybe I misunderstood the comment, and just as I was about to chalk it up to not listening well, he reiterated his sentiment as calmly as saying, “It’s about 75 degrees today.”

Dumbfounded, I immediately exited before I reacted irrationally, but continuing my day, I thought to myself, “Will this mentality ever change? Is it my job to change it? Are ignorant people simply ignorant and should not be paid any mind?”

Now, a little background on myself for you. I grew up with diverse groups of people; male, female, Black, White, Hispanic, Asian, Indian, upper class, middle class, lower class (according to socioeconomic standards) and everyone in between. With that being said, I learned the arts of inclusion, acceptance, and striking common ground with others to increase comfort levels at a young age. In my interactions with different races, as the subject inevitably arises, I make sure they know I avoid racial slurs and derogatory comments so to make sure they know racism occupies no real estate in my state of mind. At NO point in time do I want my Black or non-Black friends to think that I share in any discriminatory thoughts/feelings about any ethnic group, especially, my own. I, like numerous others, have encountered racism, prejudice, discrimination, and general ignorance on a semi-regular basis since I first read the word “nigger” in a Ben Carson autobiography when I was in about the 3rd grade.

I attempt to extract knowledge from every experience I encounter, and the ones immersed in race relations bear no exception. The presence of the aforementioned states of thought never ceases to amaze or surprise me, and perhaps, in a cynical manner of thinking, I prepare myself for true feelings of prejudice to surface sooner or later through ascending a guard of low expectations for others. As racial conflicts have arisen throughout my life, some have been resolved with words, some through other means, and some have gone unresolved. I will remind you of one of my best friends who was murdered last September in a hate crime, so if I seem sensitive to this subject, it is because I am tired. Tired of being surrounded by prejudice, racial insensitivity, and general ignorance with no desire to increase knowledge, which brings me back to yesterday.

I understand that people possess various feelings on the subject, so I would genuinely like to hear from you, the reader. What do you think? Do you feel that it is not that big of a deal? Do you feel that we, as a people, need to accept the ignorance and continue on in our pursuit of progression? Is it not our fight to fight?

Thanks for checking in the GAME with Just GQ! Stay tuned for updates on the NEW JustGQ.com, as we near its launch! God Bless!

Friday, May 27, 2011

Best Foot Forward In ACTION!

Good morning, Just GQ readers! I frequent the subject of my Best Foot Forward platform, so I thought for today's FIRST blog (yes, there will be another one later on in the day), I would let you all see BFF in action! Enjoy! Also, subscribe to the Just GQ YouTube Channel for all the Just GQ vlogs AND MORE!

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Late Night With The Gentleman (Vlog)


I was up on the late night tip a few nights ago, so I thought I would check in with the readers as the launch date for JustGQ.com rapidly approaches! Enjoy!

Monday, May 23, 2011

Love From Afar



Due to the nature of my childhood in which I moved semi-frequently, I learned the importance of maintaining relationships regardless of geographical location. The fact of the matter lies in that friendships possess a conditional nature of sorts, a threshold for the necessary effort. When miles, states, and sometimes oceans fill the physical gap previously occupied by maybe a few streets, some “friends” pull the “this is my stop” cord and conveniently opt out of a friendship that requires additional energy. The same holds true in the ever-controversial construct that is… (cue dramatic music “dun dun dun”)— the long distance relationship. (*collective gasp!*)

The masses speak poorly of this type of relationship because long distance relationships embody the polar opposite of convenience, the direct contrast of simplicity. Relationships within the same city or state provide difficulties within themselves – commitment, compromise, and communication, not to mention trust. When couples add complication with differing area codes, reevaluation must take place. “How valuable is this? How much effort are we willing to expend to make this work? Would we be better off just maintaining contact until we can be in the same place together?” These are only a few examples of the posed questions that need to be asked in order to properly evaluate the situation.

Now, I could paint a clean, pretty picture of flowers, clouds, and hearts with Crayola™ watercolors to depict long distance relationships, however that would NOT be Just GQ, would it? Personally, I have taken part in a number of long distance relationships, dating back to my high school years. Some of them have been positive experiences, from which lifelong friendships were born, and others crashed in flaming messes nose-diving into a sea of resentment and ruined opportunity. This unpredictable imbalance exhibits the risk potential participants in the long distance sweepstakes assume.

While I am not an expert, I have, through my experiences, acquired a bit of knowledge, and from that knowledge, I feel that I am able to identify points of emphasis to make the distance less of a factor.

Communication: As the cornerstone of general human interaction, open and honest communication situates itself in the premier position within long distance relationships. Since physical encounters may very well be limited to a few times a month, conversation serves as the new manner of regular interaction. Beyond the daily conversation, open, honest communication holds a high degree of significance because through that avenue, potential conflicts, blowups, and arguments can be mitigated to normal, calm discussion. If something bothers you, voice it, so the gripe can be addressed, resolved, and from there, progression may occur.

Quid Pro Quo: Simply said “this for that”. Concessions are not meant to be one-sided; if they are then a problem most likely exists. Identify issues MOST critical to the overall happiness of the involved parties, and resolve them through MUTUAL concessions. Remaining hung up on trivial matters and/or complaining about everything gets annoying and will not bode well for the continuation of the relationship down the road.

Maintenance/Planning: As humans, we are weak and need reminders of why we do the things we do. With that said, KEEP YOURSELF TOGETHER! Nothing Almost nothing is worse than waiting 5 weeks to see someone, and they look like trash on a stick! Ladies, MAKE SURE that hair, those nails, those clothes (or lack there of) are impeccable. Fellas, keep that facial hair trimmed, the lines tight, and everything smooth. AND everyone PLEEEEASE keep those bodies together è click here to ‘get right’ (PLUG)! Make plans prior to the visit to do something fun and unique, so the visits will be memorable. These memories serve as reminders of why the involved parties got involved in the first place.

All jokes aside, relationships are difficult enough without adding unpredictable factors such as distance, but if the participants work together to make it work, there is no reason why it should not. Care, communication, and chemistry propel relationships, and regardless of location, the pillars remain the constant and viable.

Thanks for checking in the GAME with Just GQ! Follow me on Twitter for updates @GQ50! JustGQ.com COMING SOON!

Thursday, May 19, 2011

The Gentleman’s Wingtips to Victory



Following a 21-point demolition of the Miami Heat at the hands of the Chicago Bulls, LeBron James, Dwayne Wade, and surprisingly Udonis Haslem led Miami to a Game 2 victory, evening the Eastern Conference Finals at one game a piece. On the Western Conference side, the Dallas Mavericks claimed an early 1-0 lead in the series, propelled by a dynamic 48-point performance by their general Dirk Nowitzki; a performance that saw him go for an NBA record 24-24 from the charity stripe. In today’s Just GQ, I wanted to take a look at “The Gentleman’s Wingtips to Victory” in these riveting NBA Playoffs.

Miami Heat – Just GQ’s Champion

After my squads got bounced from the tournament (Celtics & Pacers; don’t judge me), I threw my support to the Miami Heat. With the Big 2 & a Possible at the helm (word to Michael Smith) of the Heat attack, I just cannot bet against them. I think in order for the Heat to acquire their first Eastern Conference crown since 2006, LeBron James and Dwayne Wade must remain consistent while receiving bench help. Last night’s game displayed the reserved energy and consequential production the Big 2 can muster when the Heat get help doing the dirty work—diving for loose balls, offensive/defensive boards, tough interior defense. Udonis Haslem’s energy and production, point, boards, and no statistical categories, allowed the Big 2 to focus on utilizing their athleticism to generate easy scoring opportunities. Continuation of this production from the other Heat members bodes well in the their quest for a championship.

Chicago Bulls

The key for the Bulls is simple. Support for, MVP, Derrick Rose. While a dynamic player and well deserving of all the recognition he receives, the Bulls cannot shut down altogether when Rose is unable to perform up to the standard fans have become accustomed to seeing, which is what occurred in Game 2. The multitude of Heat defenders thrust at Rose forced him to experience a 7-23 shooting night producing 21 points. No secret exists in acknowledging D. Rose as the Bulls’ number one option but who else? He needs a supporting cast! Boozer is inconsistent. Taj Gibson and Joakim Noah bring great energy but cannot be counted on to generate substantial amounts of points. Luol Deng’s 17 point, 6 rebound playoff average probably embodies the Bulls’ second option, however when Deng usually bears the burden of guarding one, LeBron James, is it fair to depend on him to be the only other viable option besides Rose?

Dallas Mavericks – Just GQ’s Western Conf. Pick

Behind their general, 7-foot sharp shooter Dirk Nowitzki, the Dallas Mavericks boast a host of weapons including three-point shooting powers, Jason Terry, Peja Stojakovic, and reformed point guard turned “2”, Jason Kidd. In addition to those perimeter predators, the Mavs, arguably the most complete team remaining in the Playoffs, possess energy role players, who complete the squad, in Shawn Marion, Tyson Chandler, and Jose Barea, the fearless 6-foot point guard, who complemented Nowitzki’s showing with a 21-point exhibition of his own. For the Mavs, frequently characterized as the team who cannot get over the hump, to come out of the West and potentially find themselves atop the league as champions, they must, simply, be the Dallas Mavericks. They must utilize the plentiful weapons they possess along with the abundance of experience and leadership, which fills their roster, and allow it to boost them to heights unreached in the past.

Oklahoma City Thunder

Down 1-0, the young upstart Thunder are far from out of the Western Conference Finals, however in order for them to be victorious in the WCF and perhaps further, they must mitigate the confusion over who runs the show, while still providing support to, scoring champion, Kevin Durant. Russell Westbrook, a great player—yes, needs to remember that he is, indeed, Russell Westbrook and not Derrick Rose. He also must keep near the forefront of his mind that his teammate, not adversary, is none other than the most prolific scorer in a league that houses great point producers such as Kobe Bryant and the aforementioned LeBron James. Westbrook must serve as a point guard, and by doing so, he will not need to force shots because easier scoring opportunities will come his way due to the necessary attention that must be paid elsewhere to the other Thunder scoring threats.

Thanks for checking in the GAME with Just GQ! Leave your comments on the blog, and stay tuned for more posts! God Bless!

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

The Ultimatum



In yesterday’s post, which addressed the phenomenon, jealousy/envy, I briefly touched on the “pseudo ex”. For those of you who have not kept current with your Just GQs *cough cough*, I will redefine what I meant by the “pseudo ex” via The Big Green Monster.


Pseudo ex: “…in the new age of dating, where men and women act as though they retain either an allergy to or obsession with titles, pseudo exes describe those who serve as the “pretty much” boyfriend or girlfriend.”

So with the definition clarified, the question remains: how does someone end up a pseudo ex-boyfriend or girlfriend. Well, speaking as someone with more pseudo exes than actual exes, I place titled relationships on an elevated pedestal as the majority of the population does. I believe everyone holds unique, personal conditions for which they must mentally prepare prior to voluntarily accepting the title “boyfriend” or “girlfriend”. For some, the monogamy thing stands in their ways; they do not want to only be with that one person. For others, they may genuinely be focused on their professional and/or personal progression and do not want to divide that focus for someone else. Personally, while the previous two examples received significant thought and concern, my number one stipulation lies in the consideration that I am willing to give another person and whether I can increase it to a level that will be satisfactory to my mate. As I stated before, I take titled relationships seriously, so if I know that I will be unable to perform up to my standard, I respectfully decline the invitation to be someone’s boyfriend.

Now once people hear the statement of decline, usually one of three reactions will occur.

  1. They ignore: People may confuse hearing “not interested” with “try harder”; easily confusable right? Sike ya’ mind. Generally speaking, the people who ignore declined invitations are proud people not used to hearing “no” or people who are truly believe that the person they are pursuing is worth humbling themselves to continue after rejection.
  2. They retreat: Another reaction people exhibit is full retreat, acting as if the conversation never even occurred. Some may try to go back to the type of interaction prior to, while others may disappear and not acknowledge the person they previously pursed.
  3. They befriend: The strategists befriend. They attribute the received rejection to poor timing, not knowing each other well enough, or any other circumstance that does not convey a mismatch. Those who befriend usually take it back to the drawing board and begin formulating their new strategy to win the one they desire.

As the pursuer actively subjects herself to the befriend—propose exclusivity—get rejected—re-strategize—befriend cycle in her quest for the apple of her eye, one could understand how frustration would build. At this point the title of this post becomes a pretty appealing option, as the person in pursuit clearly wants to be with the pursued party, but the pursuer begins to feel foolish in this perceived one-sided affair. At this time, something like the following dribbles from the fatigued pursuer’s lips, “Look, I’m tired of chasing you. Either we are going to be together or…”

Anything after the “or…” does not really matter, as it will most likely fall on deaf ears. Why people think this is an innovative, effective strategy baffles me. I will go ahead and say that anyone who exclusively chases for that long has my admiration because I KNOW I could never do that, but I digress. People configure the limits of other parties’ preparation and feel that after 1 month, 3 months, 6 months, they should be aptly prepared to be in an exclusive, monogamous relationship. In that exists an underlying fallacy because as a separate party, you cannot estimate another person’s prep time especially if the other party has maintained a lack of receptiveness to the idea. Presenting an ultimatum in most cases results in about a…let me see… carry the 3… a 0.03% success rate! The people who find success in forcing someone into exclusivity may find themselves getting cheated on or in a short relationship as that relationship was not where the other party wanted to be in the first place.

Speaking from experience, it is very possible to possess a desire to enter into an exclusive relationship with someone, but that desire may be deterred by poor timing, extenuating circumstances, or general emotional unpreparedness, which in waiting for its passing may extend the nonexclusive phase. We are unable to decide what is appropriate for others, so we should turn the focus to ourselves. If you feel that too much time has elapsed and you want to be elsewhere, then go. The other party has no choice but to respect your decision made in your best interest. Nagging, complaining, and presenting ultimatums will only lengthen the aforementioned phase or end everything altogether. If you choose to hang around, that too is a perfectly acceptable course of action but understand that if that door is chosen, you possess limited input rights because you have knowingly chosen to continue without a title. A relationship without a title makes commitment optional.

Thanks for checking in the game with Just GQ! We have made MAJOR strides on JustGQ.com, which is nearing its launch date! Please leave your comments and STAY TUNED for more Just GQ! God Bless!

Monday, May 16, 2011

The Big Green Monster



Commonly visited themes in all aspects of life, jealousy and envy manifest in those with slow trigger fingers on the 12-gauge that is opportunity (please excuse the violent reference). The reasons for missed or failed opportunity vary as people’s personalities often do, however the jealousy and envy seeps in following the actual action or lack there of occurs. First, let’s decipher between these two terms, as 94.43% of the human population does not truly know the difference. Jealousy refers to overly intensive protection of something that is YOURS, whereas envy refers to feelings of intense desire to have something that belongs to SOMEONE ELSE, like a material possession, achievements, status, or a boyfriend/girlfriend. Uh oh. *Approaches scorer’s table* Time to check in! (sounds horn)

Disclaimer: No names have been used to protect the identities of the involved parties.

Once upon a time, I had an ex-girlfriend (shocking, right?), and this particular ex-girlfriend was no good for me from the jump, probably a solid reason as to why she is my ex. She displayed jealous behavior the ENTIRE time we talked and became envious afterwards. I mean she is, to this day, manipulative, two-faced, and dishonest. Yeah, I think that is a pretty accurate depiction.

In addition to my ex-girlfriends, I have acquired a number of pseudo exes over the years. What is a pseudo ex, you ask? Well, in the new age of dating, where men and women act as though they retain either an allergy to or obsession with titles, pseudo exes describe those who serve as the “pretty much” boyfriend or girlfriend.

After breaking up with these two classes of exes, friendship can ensue, but whether that friendship is of genuine or circumstantial nature fails to be seen until one or both parties move onto new interests. At this point, behaviors may alter, as facades disappear and true motives become revealed. In the case of my aforementioned ex, she seemed to pack sabotage in her purse every time I saw her after the break-up. When she saw me with another girl, she caused scenes to transfer the focus to her. When I got a new girl, she talked bad about her to anyone who had ears and provided the FedEx “same day” delivery of nasty looks whenever possible.

I have also, like many others, been on the receiving end of the comments, looks, etc. I will admit, though, the salty ex-boyfriend, or SXBF for the sake of saving characters, has always impressed me as quite the comedic character, which a large part of why I cannot allow myself to be that guy. The SXBF is pretty much, an overly emotional sucker, in my opinion, and while every man plays this role at least once, the important thing to remember is to NOT REPEAT that behavior because you look weak very weak!

When one’s mental capacity succumbs to envy, his/her ability to progress becomes paralyzed, and regret, progression’s antagonist, takes over. The person who writhes in envy allows their actions and emotions to be propelled by the regret of missed opportunity. If you see that someone wants to be in your spot, simply recognize it as envy and continue on, failing to acknowledge the cry for attention. When people feel as though they need to put on a performance for you, that is, essentially, the proverbial white flag waving, proclaiming you as the victor. The key lies in progression versus regression. Do not view someone else’s happiness with disgust because when your disgust monopolizes your focus, YOU LOSE!

Thanks for checking in the GAME with Just GQ! Leave your comments on the blog, and stay tuned for more posts! God Bless!

Thursday, May 12, 2011

King James' Return to Royalty



Can we talk about this guy LeBron James one time? For those of you who did not see Game 5 against the Celtics last night, the Heat were able to close out the series with a 10-point victory in Miami, advancing the Eastern Conference Finals for the first time since Dwayne Wade and Shaquille O’Neal claimed the organization’s first championship in 2006. CAN YOU DIG IT? (Shaq voice) But I digress. Everybody holds a degree of familiarity with “The Decision” and the path Mr. James traveled from America’s darling to the most HATED man in sports or the new Kobe, if you will (I realize that was petty).

No greater story existed this NBA offseason than the rock star ascension to fame that was Miami’s “Big 3”. Perennial all-stars, Chris Bosh (the weak link) and LeBron James, joined Dwayne Wade in hopes of not only bring one, but a multitude of championships to the Sunshine State.  However, during the season, the media, as well as random people with biased opinions had a field day proclaiming failure on the offseason blockbuster siginings, as the Heat started off rough, displaying trouble in deciphering the roles of its players, specifically in the crucial moments of the game.  With just a month remaining in the regular season, the Miami franchise not-so-boasted the NBA’s worst final seconds FG percentage hitting just 1 of 14 (7.14%) game-tying or game-winning shots in the last 10 seconds of regulation and/or overtime, and the majority of those misses traced back to the hands (and crown) of King James.

Fast forwarding to last night, the Celtics led for virtually the entire game, which like Game 4, an OT victory by the Heat in Boston, was not decided until late in the 4th quarter. At that time, King James mounted his throne, playing like many had forgotten he was capable. James put Boston away orchestrating a personal 10-0 in the final two minutes en route to a 33-point, 7 rebound, and 4 assist performance complementing 34 points, 10 rebounds, 5 assists, and 4 steals by Wade. That late game exhibition reminded many of his unforgettable performance against Detroit, when in Cleveland. In that Game 5, coincidentally, he scored a playoff-career high, 48 points, but more impressively, the then 22-year-old racked up 29 of his team’s last 30 points in the victory.

Fans and critics of LeBron James, alike, must tip their hats to the captivatingly explosive athlete, who displayed his ability to make shots from outside, inside, and in between when his team needed him and the game was on the line. Kudos to LeBron James, as that performance earned him the “Gentleman’s Stamp of Approval”! 

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Broaden the Scope!



Welcome. Let’s just go ahead and get into it! To achieve is to “reach or attain a desired objective, level, or result by effort, skill, or courage”. Now, with that in mind, take a minute for an activity. Either mentally, on your computer, or with a pen and paper jot down the goals you plan to attain.

Finished? Now, obviously I have no means of knowing what exactly you wrote down, however, I would be willing to bet that if I told you to make your goals more grand or more expansive you could. Maybe I’m right, maybe I’m wrong, BUT why is this not the normal scope through which we view our potential, our ability to achieve. Why do we give ourselves alligator arms when reaching for success?

As I completed my undergraduate curriculum, taking the capstone course for my major, my professor encouraged all of his students to organize their goals in a manner that supported progressive thinking and realization of potential. He urged us to set our goals in three categories:

Short Term: Short term goals are obviously of a more immediate nature, but with that said, the time periods’ length is relative to the greater timeline. Personally, my short term goals span from 6 months to a year.

Long Term: Conversely, long term goals utilize the attainment of short term goals as additional materials to paint the bigger picture. (See what I did there?) Long term goals, typically, range from a minimum of a year to 5+, with no true cap on the time.

B.H.A.G.: My personal favorite of the bunch, this category of goals grants permission to dream absurdly HUGE! I know a lot of you were confused by the acronym, but B.H.A.G. stands for “big hairy audacious goal”. The more ludicrous it sounds to other people (especially the doubters), the better.

Burst through the ceiling, and let the light shine on your pursuit of GREATNESS! No one can stop you but YOU, and I understand that many people say things such as this as clichés, but IT IS TRUE! Society, doubters, and in some cases family and friends attempt to ground those who dare to dream and ACCOMPLISH big, but BROADEN THE SCOPE through which you view your ability to succeed and do just that, SUCCEED!

GOD BLESS! JUST GQ OUT! *DROPS MIC*

Pusha T and Kanye Cypher!

I found this as I was perusing YouTube, y'all know I LOVE G.O.O.D. Music! This is for those who share that with me! Hope you enjoy!

Monday, May 9, 2011

And the Winner Is...



First, allow me to thank you all for bearing with me during this last week. I am in the midst of finishing up the first year of my masters, and my time has been very limited. Also, the development of JustGQ.com is continuing as we ready for its launch! *sigh* Now that we are all caught up...

When united with someone in a relationship, we experience many a great moments, memories that become engrained into our mental photo albums. However, during break-ups, the contents of those mental photo albums overwhelm us, as we mourn the love that was or celebrate the freedom that is—depending on how you view it, of course. Once the initial sadness subsides, the focus then narrows to moving on, rebuilding, and “winning” the break-up—word to Charlie Sheen. I know that was petty, but I digress.

In pursuit of victory during a break-up bonanza, people, typically, saturate their interactions with feelings of reclamation camouflaged in a cloak of nonchalance. The portrayed façade serves as a strategic tool in directly and/or indirectly manipulating the perception of the former significant other and uninvolved, yet heavily opinionated parties. As friends and acquaintances bombard those involved in the break-up with sincere or sometimes insincere concerns regarding their well-being, the idea is that “if I act like I don’t care, then I won’t care” or “when he/she asks about me, I don’t want him/her to think I am stressing it”.

While in my opinion, I believe this behavior to be somewhat customary and expected, in these situations, I have, to the best of my ability, attempted to shift the allocation of my attention from a portraying false attitude to increased gratitude (please excuse the corny rhyme—shrug). Our past experiences broaden our life acumen, so while understandable, instead of allowing oneself to be consumed by anger and sadness or keeping score in the break up, accept the failed relationship for what it is, a learning experience. Concentrate on the takeaways, and enhance yourself for future interactions because if you are not in a good state on your own, you do not need to depend on someone else to get you there!

Thanks for checking in the game with Just GQ! Please feel free to leave comments and questions, as I love the post discussion! Stay tuned and get ready for JustGQ.com! COMING SOON!

Monday, May 2, 2011

What Are We?



Due to my academic pursuit and finals, I am replaying "What Are We" today. I hope you enjoy it!
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Joe meets Jane.  Joe asks Jane on a date.  Joe and Jane go on their date and have a lot of fun.  Then, during the next week when Joe and Jane are at the movies, Joe asks, “Where do you see this going?” Jane replies, “I don’t know, but I’m fine with friends, since we are getting to know each other better.” Joe agrees.
Fast forward two months.  Joe and Jane are still hanging out and talking regularly, but when Jane calls Joe to ask if he wants to hang out on a Friday night, Joe declines and informs Jane he made plans to go out to eat with Judy.  How would you feel?

Typically, Jane would feel hurt, as if Joe had done something wrong by going out with another girl because her feelings had deepened since their initial and ONLY conversation.  BUT Joe, in fact, has done nothing wrong because in the conversation regarding the intentions of BOTH parties, FRIENDS was the title upon which Joe AND Jane agreed. 

Women, and sometimes men, have the tendency to commit the other party’s feelings to the level of feelings, which they possess.  In most cases, as a woman’s feelings grow for the man in which she is interested, she will slowly cut off the other men she had previously entertained as she has found whom she wants.  Men, usually, will not do the same, and this basic difference in the mentality of the sexes is what creates, arguably, one of the most frequently encountered topics of disagreement.

Unless, he/she makes a statement declaring a state of monogamy and/or exclusivity, NEVER assume that the other party has stopped talking to other interests.  Personally, when I begin seeing someone, I ALWAYS assume the lady is talking to other guys because if I find her attractive, someone else probably did before me, but people set themselves up to have their feelings hurt when they commit their interest’s feelings to the level at which theirs are.

Now, at this point, I know the ladies who have been in this situation before are rolling their eyes and may be bordering on disgruntled saying, “Who does he think he is? Dr. Phil or somebody? I’m not waiting on him!” 

Chill before you check in.

Due to societal influences, the abundance of other women/men, OR perhaps a simple lack of readiness in mentality for a relationship, your significant other may INITIALLY be reluctant to jump into a relationship.  THE ABSOLUTE WORST thing you can do is force him/her into a relationship for which he/she is not ready!  People who present ultimatums and other methods of forcing a relationship on their interest set themselves up to either get cheated on and/or be in a 10 second relationship, one in which you will NOT enjoy.  If he is worth it, wait, but if he is not, then I think you can deduce what your move will be.

The mentality you SHOULD use, you ask?  I will leave you with an often used adage of mine when talking to women about this subject.  “A man’s uncertainty can drive a woman away, but a woman’s patience will win a man’s commitment.”

Thanks for checking in the game with the Just GQ blog!  As always, it has been a pleasure discussing these topics with you!  GOD BLESS!

Thursday, April 28, 2011

Power Struggle



Today's post is a replay from last year that raises issue to a frequently encountered dilemma, the struggle for power in dealings with the opposite sex. Sit up and get ready to CHECK IN THE GAME!
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Control within relationships changes hands like a game of hot potato.  Particularly earlier in relationships, a subliminal, undeniable struggle for control/power exists because no one wants to desire someone more than they are. Think of a familiar relationship in its fledging stages, the gaming phase.  Place your interest and yourself on either side in a tug of war with the rope being the control of the relationship and the mud pit being the emotions felt.  1, 2, 3; PULL!  Allow the power struggle to begin. Sound familiar?


Though normal, these antics are juvenile at their core, as well as avoidable, if desired.  Depending on how the players play the game, the stress involved with the period of time in which personalities mesh or repel one another does not have to sub in.  When manipulation is the player’s go-to move, that party uses the tricks to gain control and yield a sense of dependency from the other person involved.  Plain and simple: One plays with the other’s head to make themselves feel needed.

Comfort and trust serve as the cement holding the bricks of the relationship structure together, and without those two fundamental materials the structure will disintegrate.  Once a level of comfort is reached between people then trust may start to be generated between the two parties.  Now, at this point, I know some of you are asking, “How can that level of comfort even be reached, Just GQ?” 

Well, as I stated in “Run, Forrest, Run”, “Avoid overcomplicating simple situations and understanding can be achieved. Clarity lives in simplicity…”.

I starkly stated, in my humble opinion that dodging the tendency to add unnecessary variables to the equation allows for easier arrival at the solution.  Identification of what BOTH parties desire not only allows for clear direction of the relationship, it minimizes game playing and thus the power struggle for control ceases because it loses its importance. Expectations may be discussed and rationalized as feasible or of another sort, enabling clear vision and compromise to commence.  The optimum grade for a relationship is when a both people establish a mutual care for one another with a comfort level that allows for cools to be taken off and natural interaction to exist without pressure.  

Allow for natural progression WITHOUT forcing the issue.  Live in the moment until the moment evolves to become more, and keep situations low stress for easier coexistence.  Thanks for checking in the GAME with the Just GQ blog!  Keep the questions and comments coming.  I love hearing from you all (contact@JustGQ.com).  God Bless!

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

All Aboard the Highway 2 Mars


Nashville hip-hop artist, Stix Izza (@stixizza), is slated to drop the highly anticipated “Highway 2 Mars”, his follow-up to the critically acclaimed “Bridge to Jupiter”. The songwriter, previously signed to Warner Bros. Records, prides himself on creating music that is universal by nature, appealing to a wide range of listeners and fans of various genres. Stix draws inspiration from his life experiences, none of which is greater than the passing of his father when he was just 16 years of age. He pours honest emotion into his music, an element very contrary to the vacant fluff, which saturates the music industry today.

For Highway 2 Mars, Stix teamed up with some Southern music heavy hitters including the likes of radio personalities, Dolewite (@Dolewite101) & Scooby (@RNScoob), well-known entertainment personality, DJ Crisis (@thedjcrisis), who hosts the musical composition, and DJ Fate Eastwood (@fateeastwood), who has produced for major artists such as Yo Gotti, Baby, and Lil’ Weezy F. Baby just to name a few. So gear up and GET HYPED for the new music coming your way from the Southern Entertainment Award winning Stix Izza!