Thursday, May 6, 2010

Trivial Matters


Let me paint a picture for you.  You call your boyfriend and say, “Hey babe. What are you doing?”  He responds by saying, “I am headed out to meet Ashley for lunch.  She is in town for the day, and we were going to catch up for a little bit.”

How do you react? Do you wind up your neck to start moving and finger to start waving, or do you simply chill and say, “Oh ok. Tell her I say hey. Call me later, babe.” (in a non-sarcastic tone by the way..)

Now before I fully dive into this frequently crossed scenario, allow me to identify this a pertinent component.  Know your significant other!  If you know your significant other frequently cheats and lies then all of this does not apply, but if you have a significant other who remains faithful to you and treats you well, then I would advise you to read carefully.

In most scenarios when a guy cheats, he lies.  If after he is up front and honest in detailing his plans for you (when, despite what you may think, he is NOT required to do), and you berate him, next time he may not be out to lunch with Ashley, he might be shooting hoops with Joe. 

I use this analogy to say this: Pick your battles.  While some men and women are simply liars, I stand by the fact that majority of good men and women lie about innocent situations to avoid the overreaction of the person to whom he/she is lying.  In case you think I am off with my thinking, this also holds true in other relationships: parent/child and friend/friend, among others.

Identifying and discussing insecurities is a nice topping for the cake that is a relationship, but trust is the main ingredient!  No matter how hard you try you are not going to control your significant other’s every move, so when you try to do so, you are, quite frankly, wasting your time.  Controlling behavior in most situations becomes annoying and may be counter productive in the long run as it has driven people into the arms of another.  So, next time, stay kool, kalm, and kollected because you know your mate and have no reason to worry.

Thanks for joining me for another Just GQ experience. Check in the game! 

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